Monday, 31 October 2016

The Mystery of the disappearance of Agatha Christie

The Mystery of the disappearance of Agatha Christie
Agatha Christie was an English novelist, specialising in crime and mysteries, and also a Dame. Not the panto kind, the real kind.
The Guinness Book of Records lists Agatha Christie as the best selling novelist of all time, selling over 2 billion copies, mostly to my grandmother, who really loved them. Every time she went to a car-boot sale, my gran would pick up a Hercule Poirot novel or Jane Marple novel, even if she had bought one the previous week. Yes, my gran was bat-shit crazy.
Much like Agatha Christie.
But, unlike my grandmother, Christie was nutso-whacko because she had been kidnapped by aliens who had stripped her naked before taking her. Or she was taken by a giant wasp and Doctor Who.
I kid you not.
In 1926, Agatha Christie's husband had asked for a divorce. It probably has nothing to do with it, but I thought I'd mention it nonetheless.
December 3rd 1926, after a huge argument, Archie stormed out the family home to go spend the weekend with his new love, Nancy Neele. That night, Agatha left the house leaving behind a steamy dump on her husband's favourite dressing gown, and a letter for her secretary telling of her plans to spend the next few days in Yorkshire.
Agatha Christie's car was found perched above a chalk quarry at Newlands Corner. Inside was an expired driving licence, and her clothes.
Her Alien Abduction caused a massive public outcry. Even the Home Secretary got involved, pressurizing the police to launch a massive manhunt which included over 1000 police officers and 15,000 volunteers.
When they realised Agatha was a woman, they changed it to a woman-hunt. A newspaper also offered a £100 reward.
They didn't find Agatha Christie, despite the fact Sir Arthur Conan Doyle got involved, approaching a medium to help in the search.
Ten days later, Agatha was found at Swan Hydropathic hotel in Harrogate, Yorkshire, under the name Mrs Teresa Neele (the name of her husband's bit on the side). She claims to have no memory of those ten days, or how she got to Yorkshire.
That's because the Aliens mind-wiped her before returning her to Earth after all the probing.

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