Thursday, 13 October 2016

Fun Facts About King George II of Great Britain

King George II of Great Britain, Man of the Bush

On October 11th, 1727, George II and Caroline of Ansbach were crowned King and Queen of Great Briton.
It was love at first sight.
Really, it actually was love, not the norm when it came to Royal marriages at the time. Most were arranged for political unions.
However, George's father, the previous King George, first of his name, did not want a loveless marriage for his son.
George, not yet the second, disguised himself for a trip to Triesdorf and the court of Ansbach. He had chosen the name Likes-Them-Hairy, but that was thought to be too on the nose, so he changed it to Monsieur De Busch, which was a little more subtle.
Whilst at the Court, he met a his future wife, Caroline of Ansbach. Rumour has it, he fell in love at first sight. It was reported that George was so taken by "the good character, of Caroline, that he had of her, he could think of no-one else.
They were besotted with each other, and George was utterly devoted.
In 1707, not long after Caroline gave birth to their first son, Frederick, she caught smallpox. George refused to stay away, and remained by her side. The inevitable happened, and he contracted smallpox as well.
Both recovered.
10 Fun Facts about King George II
1) George II was the last British Monarch to be born outside of Britain. He was born and brought up in Hanover, Northern Germany.
His parents were George Louis, Hereditary Prince of Brunswick-Luneburg, and later King George I of Great Britain, and Sophia Dorothea of Celle.
After being accused of adultery, his parents' marriage was dissolved. His mother, Sophia Dorothea of Celle was imprisoned in Ahlden House and denied visitation rights to her children.
2) King George II was also the last British Monarch to lead an army in battle, during the war of the Austrian Succession, at the Battle of Dettingen in 1743.
3) Although he was German, born and bred, until the age of four, George only spoke French.
Ah, French, the language of love. Also, at the time, the language of diplomacy. It wasn't until someone realised he should learn the language of tough love that he was taught German.
He was also taught English and Italian, the languages of only-when-required love, and kinky-dirty love.
4) George II was banished from the Palace by his own father.
Before George II became king, he was the Prince of Wales. And he was quite the popular little prince. This made his father, the King, very jealous. So much so, that the King banished his son from the palace.
However, their children remained under the custody of the Prince George's father, the King. Both George and his wife, Caroline, missed their kids tremendously.
They decided to sneak into the palace for a visit. The sneakiness took its toll. Caroline fainted and George cried like a widdle baby.
Upon seeing this display of Sheesh-Grow-A-Pair, the King changed his mind and allowed them weekly visits.
5) George II banished his own son from the palace.
In a case of history repeating itself, George II didn't get along with his son, Frederick.
It didn't help that Frederick kept taunting his father.
In December 1736, after a holiday in Hanover, George returned to England. His ship was caught in a storm and rumours swept London, which may have been started by Frederick, that the King had drowned.
George II would have liked nothing more to put those rumours to rest. But he fell ill with a fever, and a serious case of What-The-Heck-Is-Growing-From-My-Arse.
The Piles and Fever kept him bedridden.
However, not one to miss another trick, Prince Frederick started another rumour that his father, the King, was dying. Again. But this time it'll work. For sure. Or not.
The King George-Push-These-Things-Back-Into-My-Anus had no choice but to get up and attend a social function to dispel the rumours put about by his git of a son.
Frederick further tormented his father by banning both the King and Queen from the birth of his daughter in July 1737. He actually went a step further than just banning them. As his wife was about to give birth, Frederick bundled her into a coach and drove off with her in the middle of the night.
As a punishment, George II banished his son and daughter-in-law from the palace. Although the King did allow them to keep custody of their kids.
6) As Prince of Wales, George-Not-Yet-The-Second, survived an assassination attempt.
In December 1716, George-Currently-Still-A-Prince, was at the Drury Lane Theatre when an assassin tried to shoot him. The assassin was such a bad shot, the Prince of Wales survived unharmed. Not so for the Prince's guard, who was killed during the altercation.
7) King George II's hatred of his son continued until his son's death.
And afterwards.
When Frederick's mother was ill, the King banned him from visiting her on her death bed.
After Frederick, the Prince of Wales, died from a burst abscess, the King was heard to have said, "I lost my eldest son, but I'm glad of it."
Sheesh, way to hold a grudge.
8) King George II's wife, Queen Caroline, died on November 20th, 1737.
As I said above, they were devoted to each other. George really did love her.
And this surprised a lot of people at the time who considered the King to be a horrible, mean-spirited git.
After her death, he displayed "a tenderness of which the world thought him before utterly incapable."
Just before she died, she told her husband, the King, who was crying like a widdle baby, something he apparently did a lot, that he should get married again.
He replied, "Non, j'aurai des maitresses."
Which translated as "Get me a hooker and a mattress, let's do it like Klingons in a tornado."
Nah, it doesn't. But it's not that far off what he did say.
He said, "No, I shall have mistresses."
Because although he loved his wife, and would not sully her memory by taking another, mistresses don't count. 
9) King George II had a whole bunch of mistresses.
And that was even before the death of his wife.
But, it's all okay. George kept his wife, Caroline, fully informed about his depravities. Including the incident with the badger, the hedgehog, and the goat.
It was known that Henrietta Howard, who became the Countess of Suffolk, and was Queen Caroline's women-of-the-bedchamber, was one of his mistresses. Hmm, wonder why the King made her a countess?
Amalie Von Wallmoden was also one of King George II's mistresses. She later became the Countess of Yarmouth. Hmm, wonder how she earned the promotion to Countess?
Amalie was actually married at the time and gave birth to a son, Johann Ludwig. Although privately the King acknowledge him to be his son, he didn't do it publicly. Nope, that'd be wrong.
10) King George II died whilst having a crap on October 25th, 1760.
The half blind, almost deaf King rose early in the morning. After drinking a nice cup of hot chocolate, he did what most people do, and took a poo, yes a number two, in the loo.
His valet heard a loud crash, like thunder. That was one heck of a dump.
He rushed into the bog to find the King on the floor, ever so slightly soiled. Feel sorry for the guy cleaning up that mess.
The valet carried the king to his bed, but he was already dead.
Bonus Facts
King George II died at almost 77-years-old, having lived longer than any other English monarch before him.
A post-mortem concluded he had squeezed too hard which had caused the right ventricle of his heart to explode.
His last wishes were that his and his wife's coffins would have their sides removed so their remains could "mingle".

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