Wednesday, 8 April 2015

5 Fun Facts About Edward the Confessor

Fun Facts About Edward the Confessor
1. Edward the Confessor was born as a baby.
Yes, that's generally how it happens. It's not certain of the exact date, as they weren't good at keeping accurate records back in the day, but he was definitely a baby when he was born.
Most historians believe Edward the Confessor was born in 1003ish in Oxfordshire, England.
2. Edward's father was Ethelred the Unready, which was his excuse to his wife on their wedding night.
"I wasn't ready. Can we try again in ten minutes?"
3. Edward had two brothers, Alfred, and Godgifu.
Oops, Godgifu was his sister. Wonder why that name didn't catch on? He also had a myriad of older half-siblings. His father and mother were a little promiscuous to say the least.
4. Edward the Confessor was called The Confessor because he ran a series of experiments on hedgehogs trying to extract confessions from them using nipple clamps.
Or maybe because he is said to have lived a porpoise and saintly life.
Although what dolphins have to do with anything, I don't know. Oh, wait ... pious. He lived a pious life, not porpoise.
5. Edward became King of England on the 8th June 1042.
6. Edward died on the 5th January 1066.
The following day he became the first King of England to be buried at Westminster Abbey.
That probably had nothing to do with him commissioning the building of the Abbey, though. Just a coincidence.
Harold-Soon-To-Lose-An-Eye-To-William-The-Conker-Player was proclaimed king and crowned king on the same day, using Edward's dead body as a throne.

7. About 100 years after he died, Edward was canonised by Pope Alexander III in an ancient ceremony of digging up his rotting corpse and shooting him out of a cannon.
Yep, pretty sure that's how they made someone a saint back then.
He was adopted as the Patron Saint of England until a total git came along and killed a dragon. Sheesh, I hate that Saint George bloke. Killing dragons should never be rewarded.


Honeybug said...

It's a good thing Dragons live for... well, for however long they live! I am relearning so much history and can't wait for another fly-by from the oldest dragon alive to date!! Loving it!

Jed Cullan said...

Thanks, Honeybug. History can be fun sometimes. My history teacher made history fun by going nuts crazy whacko at anyone who got something wrong. Which I did often, just to see his reaction. ;-)