Sunday, 30 August 2015


Image result for theodoric the great king of the ostrogothsON THIS DAY IN HISTORY - 30th of AUGUST
30th of August, 526, King Theoderic the Great, king of the Ostrogoths, a bird-like race of people who dressed in black and moped around all day with a depressed look on their faces, who lived in Italy, died of the Great Pooping, or, as it is better known, craps-a-lotta-blood. Or dysentery.
His 10-year-old son, Athalaric, took over, although it was his mother, Amalasuntha, who ruled as regent. Athalaric is known for his excesses. He drank a huge amount, ate even more, and wiped his nose on the crushed up remains of white hedgehogs. Oh, to be ten again. Those were great years.
Image result for louis xi30th of August, 1483, Louis XI, King of France, died. He had various nicknames, such as The Cunning, and The Universal Spider, because he was extremely cunning and devious, and because he had eight hairy legs.
At school he was known as Louis-You-Got-A-Huge-Snout, and Wets-His-Bed.
Both of those nicknames were started by his own father, Charles VII, as the two didn't get along. Probably why, a few years later, Louis tried to overthrown his daddy in an open rebellion. It didn't go well, and his father banished him from the kingdom.
Image result for frankenstein
30th August, 1797, RUN, EVERYBODY RUN, the monster has gotten loose and it's eating a moose. On this day, back in the day, Mary Shelley, the English author of the most famous monster in the world, Frankenstein, was born.
And, Did You Know, Frankenstein is not the name of the monster.
Image result for lego ships30th August, 1799, the Dutch had a very bad day. And that's putting it mildly. Their entire fleet was captured by the British forces under the command of Sir Ralph Abercromby and Admiral Sir Charles Mitchell during the War of the Second Coalition.
Image result for shrimp on the barbie30th August, 1835, Melbourne is founded.
Let's thrown a shrimp on the Barbie and celebrate.
It was named in honour of the British Prime Minister, William Lamb, 2nd Viscount Melbourne.
A few years later, in 1847, Queen Victoria declared, "Let it be a City, for all to enjoy, even those jumping things. Wooopya-diddly-dang. G'Day, Mate."
Image result for apollo 1330th of August, 1836, the city of, OH MY GOD, Whitney, WE HAVE A PROBLEM, was founded by Augustus Chapman Allen and John Kirby Allen.

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