Monday, 5 January 2015

This Week in #OnThisDay and Randomness

Thought I would post a regular (as in every week) round-up of the #OnThisDay tweets I post on twitter.

The #OnThisDayThisWeek (that's not a real hashtag) will have a bit more to them, as I can use more than 140 characters.

I may also post a bit of added randomness, too.

Such as odd facts like this: Sea Lions run and swim faster than humans. So, if you're in a Triathlon with one, better make up time on the cycling stage.

January 2nd
On this day in 1890, President (the 23rd) Benjamin Harrison, who is best known for being a President, and the grandson of a President (the 9th), appointed the first female staffer, Alice Sanger, to the White House.

On this day in 1788, the U.S. state of Georgia, named after King George II (not the crazy one), became the fourth state to ratify the US constitution.

January 1st
On this day in 1651, Charles-Part-Two was crowned king of Scotland. It would take another 9 years and three hundred hookers before he'd become king of England. This is because the monarchy had been dissolved in 1649 after Charles-Part-Two's father, Charles-the-Plonker, had a serious case of Off-With-His-Head. He had beaten Oliver-the-evil-git-Cromwell in a game of strip poker, which annoyed Oliver-Gonna-Kill-Anyone-I-Please-Cromwell. And it pleased him to kill the king, before going on to become Lord Protector of England, and killing half of Ireland and pretty much anyone who disagreed with him.

December 31st
On this day in, well, pretty much every year for the last thousand, Britain has adopted some very strange traditions. See my last blog post to find out more.

December 30th
On this day in 1460, Richard-Of-The-Grand-Old-Duke-Of-York (who didn't have 10,000 men, only about 8,000) marched his men up a hill, down a hill, back up the hill, then down a bit, and a bit more, this is probably half-way, we'll have a rest, and then he died.

Soon after, a rainbow appeared and he came back to life, briefly, to ask his trusted friend, Bilbo Baggins, to remember him every time he saw a rainbow. Which is why we now remember the colours of the rainbow using the mnemonic Richard-Of-York-Gave-Battle-In-Vain (Red-Orange-Yellow-Groot-Bilbo-Indigo-Viagra).

December 28th
On this day in 1065, Westminster Abbey was concentrated, copulated, discombobulated, err, nope, they don't sound right. Oh, I mean consecrated. Yes, consecrated. It's when two lovers decided they had done every other room in the house, so might as well do it here, too.

That's what consecrated means, right?

Err, it might actually mean to make something sacred and to dedicate something formally to a religious purpose.

Anyways, every coronation of a king or queen in England has been held at Westminster Abbey since that day. King Edward-The-Confessor, called that because he liked to hear people confess before he shot them in the head with a AK-47, had started the process of the Abbey being consecrated, but had fallen ill and couldn't attend the love-making ceremony on the day. He died a week later, looking at porn on the internet instead. He was the first king to be buried at the Abbey.

December 26th
On this day in 1135 King Stephen was crowned. Not making that up. Yes, England had a king called Stephen. Seriously, we did. Sheesh, you guys are really sceptical, aren't you? He was the grandson of William-The-Conker-Player, who was also known as William-The-Bastard, as he was a complete and utter .... And because his Mummy and Daddy weren't married.

The reign of King-I-Step-On-Hens was marked by THE ANARCHY. Had to use capitalization for that, as it made it sound more dramatic. It was a civil war fought between King-I-Step-On-Hens and his cousin, Matilda, who liked to be called Empress Matilda (because she was the Holy Roman Empress and Queen of the Romans, being married to the Holy Roman Emperor, Henry V), and by her nickname, Suck-On-My-Little-Toe.

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