On This Day 1st January
On This Day In History - 1st of January On this day in 1651, King Charles-Part-Two, or King Charles-The-Second-Call-Girl-Gave-Me-Herpes, was crowned king of Scotland. It would take another 9 years and three hundred hookers before he'd become king of England. This is because the monarchy had been dissolved in 1649 after Charles-Part-Two's father, Charles-Not-A-Spaniel-But-A-Right-Plonker, had a serious case of Off-With-His-Head. The problem arose when Charles-The-First-King-To-Suffer-Disconnected-Neck-Syndrome beat Oliver-the-evil-git-Cromwell in a game of strip poker. This annoyed Oliver-Is-The-Monster-Beneath-Your-Bed-Cromwell. A lot. His dingle dangles weren't as big as most men's itsy-bitsies, which embarrassed him. To get back at Charles-The-First-To-See-Dead-People, Cromwell started the English Civil War. Thus began Oliver-Gonna-Get-You's manhunt for the King's manhunts. The guy was a nutter. The a...