Thursday, 14 August 2014

Wasp on a bus

For those who don't follow me on twitter, and for those who do follow me, but didn't read my tweets today (A very specific sparkle pony), here is what happened, in tweets, on my journey home today. The sequel to Snakes on a Plane.

Wasp on a Bus

Tweet1: Thirty people trapped on a bus with an angry wasp. Complete and utter panic and total chaos. Not This is actually happening!

Tweet2: Hang on. About to join the panic. It's coming straight for me!

Tweet3: Okay. Need to get off this bus. NOW!

Tweet4: Bus just pulled up at stop. Everyone just got off. I decided to stay on. Cos, I ain't afraid of no wasp.

Tweet5: Uh-oh. Now it's just me and the wasp. Should've gotten off.

Wednesday, 13 August 2014

Poetry in motion

I have an eye for poetry,
Continue reading and you will see.
I can rhyme with the best of them,
But not always.

Sunday, 10 August 2014

Twinkle, Twinkle, what?

Twinkle, twinkle, little star.
How I wonder what you are.
Up above the world so ...
Hang on, you're not a star!
Oh Cripes!

It's an asteroid!
It's hurtling towards us!
We're all gonna to die!

Must get in one more exclamation mark to make it more dramatic!

Saturday, 9 August 2014

Very tasty

Mary had a little lamb,
her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
between two slices of bread.

Wednesday, 6 August 2014

Instant Devastation

On this day in 1945, the Enola Gay, a Boeing B-29 Superfortress bomber piloted by Colonel Paul W. Tibbets, dropped the first atomic bomb on the Japanese city of Hiroshima.

The bomber took off from North Field airbase on Tinian, accompanied by two other B-29s, and made the historic journey to Japan in a little over six hours.

Although Japanese early warning radar did detect the approaching bombers, no fighters were despatched to intercept them, and Hiroshima’s anti-aircraft guns, although on alert, were ordered not to fire.

At 08:15am local time, the bomb, known as ‘Little Boy’, was released from a height of 31,060 feet. 43 seconds later it detonated at a pre-determined height of 600 meters, causing instant devastation. It is estimated that 70,000 people were killed within one second of the blast, with the number of casualties doubling soon after.

Three days later, on the 9th of August, a second bomb was dropped on Nagasaki.

Saturday, 2 August 2014

This is just wrong.

Three blind mice, three blind mice,
See how they run, see how they run,
They've had their eyeballs gouged out,
Sucked dry,
Chewed on,
And spat into the gutter,
Did you ever see such a thing in your life,
As three blind mice, three blind mice?

Bad Poetry (part one)

This little piggy went to market.
This little piggy stayed at home.
This little piggy had roast beef.
This little piggy had none.
And this little piggy was chopped and sliced and diced.
Mmm, tasty bacon.