On this day in history in 1953 Winston Churchill is knighted.
Humorous History News Report from April 24th, 1953
And, as we watch, the Prime Minister, Winston Churchill, is walking slowly down the aisle of the throne room at Buckingham Palace.
To be honest, the geezer doesn't look well. But what should we expect, he's getting on a bit. And fighting the Second World War almost single-handedly can't have been easy.
He is passing the half-way point now. He looks unsteady on his feet. He isn't walking in a straight line. He's leaning to the right, and his legs are following. And straight into the chairs. Oopsie daisy.
There's a small commotion. But we're all British, so we pretend like nothing has happened.
Churchill is back on his feet, and continues towards the throne where the young, new Queen Elizabeth II is waiting to receive him.
After an hour, he makes it, and kneels at the queen's feet in preparation to be Knighted.
She raises her sword to perform the dubbing, to the music of Dubstep. OH MY GOD. Winston Churchill sneezed as the Queen lowered her sword onto his shoulder.
It's sliced right through his neck. His head is rolling across the floor towards the seated spectators. That is totally gruesome. Two of the Queen's corgis are vomiting. The other two are licking the Prime Minister's eyeballs.
Luckily, the Queen has the finest seamstresses at her disposal. They were able to sew Churchill's head back on and he was knighted correctly. That was a heck of a close shave, though.
All's well that ends well.
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